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June 6th, 2012

Forgiving the Blameless

Before you get too upset, or too angry, or ready to whip out a big, fat cup of indignation, take into account the following:

-Caiden is 14 years old.

-He doesn't know how to drive a car.

-The coffee cup on his desk is most likely filled with juice.

-He just went through puberty. Like...just.

-He doesn't quote one, single fact in his monologue about "the choice of Homosexuality".

-He doesn't do his own laundry.

-He can barely say the word "Homosexuality".

-As he speaks, he constantly covers his heart with his two hands clasped together.

-His parents are out for the day.

-He hasn't started shaving.

-He can't sit still. His Tempo is so fast, and overwhelms him to the point where he constantly shifts his entire body in his seat.

-He hasn't yet fallen deeply, madly, completely and utterly in love.

-He doesn't pay his own rent, buy his groceries, or make his own dinner.

I want to bring this onto perspective. I want all of us to realize what we're dealing with here. I'm certainly not saying that Caidan isn't entitled to his opinion, or to his belief system, or to his own view of politics. I'm just pointing out that Caidan is still very much a child. And his child-like bewilderment with homosexuals has less to do with the above list, and more to do with his child-like ability to ape his surroundings. Like any infant, little Caidan mimics what he hears in his own house, and neighborhood. He hasn't been on the planet long enough to actually experience a myriad of gay people, nor travel far about to gather enough scientific information, but he has been hanging out with a certain group of people who have very specific feelings about what it means to be gay.

When you're 14, you want to assimilate. You want to belong. And you want to make your parents proud.

Caidan is in the middle of his own idea of what it means to be Right. He's exploring his need to be accepted in his own community, just as we all were. The big difference here, is that this little boy is spouting prejudice and hatred on the airwaves and by doing that, he's perpetuating a stereotype that in certain pockets of America, has very loyal and very radical followers. Weirdly, by subscribing to his parent's fears, by needing to be revered by his peers and his elder neighbors, Caidan is committing the worst sin I can think of:


And the one to blame certainly isn't solely the boy behind the microphone, shifting and sweating his seat, barely able to speak the word Homosexual without cutting himself off. The blame also lies elsewhere. The blame begins at home. And so does the forgiveness.