The first time I set foot in a zoo I was somewhere around 6 or 7 years old. I was with my mom and we went to take a leisurely stroll and peer at the animals. I remember seeing the giraffes. Why I remember the giraffes most of all is a bit of a mystery to me, but that’s what I remember. Their heads were bent and their necks were hunched over as if they had all swallowed a large letter “C”.

They looked sad.

I don’t know if they were or not, but I that’s what I felt.

As we moved on, we kept trying to look at all the other animals and as we passed by cage after cage after cage, I noticed other kids clawing at them, making strange jungle sounds, or sometimes trying to call them over to the bars of their cages by smacking their lips together and impersonating a cat.

Even at that young age I knew these kids were morons. First of all, a Tiger isn’t that confused, and second of all, they were plain old lousy impressions.

I left the zoo crying. My mother never really understood why, but she never took me again.

I’ve been on various dates, and when I got married Chrisanne loved to go to the zoo as well. I’ll go occasionally, but I really have to suck it up and smile. It’s not a pleasant day for me. Whether or not they’ve been brought up in captivity or not has nothing to do with the fact that some wild animals belong out in the wild. Aardvarks and Lemurs were never meant to be potty trained.

Last week a chimpanzee escaped from a zoo in China. Here’s the video capturing the little buggers great escape. I think it’s brilliant, especially considering when the zoo people try to fire a tranquilizer gun at the animal; he literally grabs it out of their hands and throws it to the ground.

I’m sure zoos are fine for most people. I’m probably one of the few that finds them a house of torture. But honestly, if I’m wrong, and all those animals are perfectly content, why did the chimp try and escape in the first place?